


I like you: that's not the problem

by fossynicks



Series: MISSING MOMENTS [1]
Category: Charmed (TV 1998)
Genre: F/M, Gen, also from the time i was 13 to now being Paige's age in s5 I ALSO FOUND MY TWO SISTERS ONLINE, barbas does a number on Paige's mind, behind the scenes fic, charmed rewatch, i love to explore piper and paige's relationship, mentions of Leo, missing moment, this is set in season 5 right after sympathy for the demon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-27
Updated: 2020-09-27
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:01:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26675587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fossynicks/pseuds/fossynicks
Summary: Paige is stressed out by magic and Barbas. Mostly Barbas. She does what she hates the most: she talks it out with her sisters.
Relationships: Phoebe Halliwell & Piper Halliwell & Prue Halliwell, Piper Halliwell & Paige Matthews
Series: MISSING MOMENTS [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1940962
Comments: 1
Kudos: 7





	I like you: that's not the problem

**Author's Note:**

> Well, so I'm deep on a Charmed rewatch and I gotta say, I'm fascinated by all the underrated Paige/Piper moments. I think the actors have chemistry and enjoyed working together and it reflected on the characters, but this just poured out of me when I saw a certain episode: Sympathy for the Demon. How, how can you actually cement Paige's position as a sister and make it realistic? Well, I relate to her a lot. I do. I get it. I was 13 when I first watched the show and now I'm 25, around Paige's age in season 5. In that time, I found two sisters from my estranged father's side online and they are wonderful. The older one reminds me so much of Piper and I put a lot on the younger one in Phoebe. Or viceversa. So yeah, I truly understand.  
> Besides, I loved getting into these characters' minds. Charmed will always be a safe haven for me. REMINDER: At this moment, they have no idea Piper is expecting a boy, that's why the word niece keeps being thrown around. Think of this as a missing moment ♥

Paige knew by now that demon fighting could be both grueling and incredibly dangerous. Most of the time, after vanquishing one of those nasty bastards, she either just wanted to nap or got an adrenaline high. There was no middle ground, the point was to pretend something downright insane didn’t just happen and she manages to snap back to her daily routine. Which was resembling less and less a normal life, but whatever. Price of being a do-gooder, accepting your destiny, completing the Power of Three, yadda, yadda.

However, Barbas has been different. Barbas left her shaken to the core. Three days and two nights had passed since their encounter, one of the worst Paige has lived through, and while the family was having quite the normal week in their standards, her mind was far from normal. The critter had gotten into her skin and put her whole psyche upside down, and she felt, again, like an outsider who couldn't catch up.

Rationally, she knew she was a natural with magic: just the other day she had orbed herself to the Mediterranean because even if orbing long-distance was incredibly draining, the perks of doing it outweighed everything. Paige didn't even like to think about all the places she could now visit or her mind would truly explode – When the Elders found her in Italy and reminded her of personal gain she told them the truth: she was practicing her magic. Don’t they want their Power of Three strong? And she was now busy with her family: Phoebe was including her in everything niece-related and Piper was annoyed at everything, but even Paige could tell she was touched about her being interested in helping her.

So given some of the most interesting months in her life, she can’t believe she’s back to being obsessed about Prue’s stash of spells and curses the older witch personally developed. It wasn’t easy to shake off the feeling, as reminders of the brunette, blue- eyed woman clouted the house. Paige sighed morosely, thinking that escaping Prue’s memory was going to be an impossible task and that she would always feel like the knock-off version of the sister all the demons in the underworld feared going up against. As she stood up from where she was trying to paint to distract her mind, she knocked off a couple of paint containers unto the floor. The crash was loud and Paige prayed, she really did, that no one would listen.

“Goddamn it!” she uttered and stared dumbly at the mess she made. Old houses have a way with how sound travels, and she hoped she was the only one still awake. She didn’t want them thinking this was some demon emergency when it was just her, being lame.

But no such luck, of course. Having sisters was complicated, sometimes. And living in the Halliwell manor truly meant having no privacy as much as she kept her door locked.

Phoebe came barreling into her room, a sports bra and shorts as an excuse for PJs. Paige smiled a little at how Phoebe didn’t just come into the room but kicked the door for dramatic effect, but it was watery and that’s when the other woman’s expression of relief at the crash not being demonic turned into a concerned, way too sympathetic expression for Paige’s liking.

“Hey, little miss, what’s wrong?”

“I’m taller than you and you are only a year older than me.” Paige grumbled.

"Actually, two."

"Barely. Personally I would say we are Irish twins. How fucked up is that, given that you are my sister from another mister?" Paige shrugged her shoulders as Phoebe cackled at what she said. She liked that Phoebe just rolled with her offensive comment at their shared mother and Paige felt a bit guilty.

“Nah, I still get big sister privileges.” Phoebe teased, with a wide smile. Paige managed to return a roll of the eyes. “Help you pick up?” She asked, while already moving to the floor and stacking the empty containers of paint where Paige kept them, in a neat row. Paige just watched, realizing Phoebe was content in the manual work and didn’t need any extra set of hands. In the comfortable silence that grew, she could get lost in her thoughts and marveled at how easy her relationship with Phoebe was.

When she knocked on that door, two years ago, Phoebe had been eager and excited, and immediately linked her arm with her own.

"... Alright, now how do we get that stain off the carpet? I have no fucking clue."

“Hey, Pheebs? _Let the object of objection become but a dream, as I cause the seen to be unseen._ ” The leftover stains on the floor disappeared as if they were never even there. Paige couldn’t help the grin she felt on her face.

“Paige, magic is wonderful and all, but that was totally unnecessary.” Phoebe told her in a soft voice.

“I am gonna… I don't know, give the painting to a future innocent or something?" She said as she flopped into the bed, covering her eyes with her arm.

“Okay, what’s going on?”

Paige saw no point in lying. “Barbas, he…” Paige paused. “He really did a number on me. I’m… I thought being claustrophobic was my biggest fear. But now? You can lock me in a closet with the lights out and I’d just orb out of there. And if I have no powers with me, I don’t know. I’m not that scared of dying anymore, knowing that this is just another plane… He showed me what my real fear was… I don’t think I was ready for that." 

Phoebe sighed and moved to the bed to lay beside her. “I can’t apologize enough for beating the crap out of you. Whether you accept it or not, you are my little sister. It is a special kind of hell in watching you, of all people, being hurt.”

“That wasn’t you. But yes, by the way that hurt, it’s good to know that you are on our side.” Paige quipped and grinned to let her know it was forgotten. The way Phoebe brought her breakfast to bed the following day and clung to her right after the attack was enough for her to know that wasn’t and wouldn’t ever be Phoebe.

“Barbas is, to me, the scariest demon out there.” Phoebe confessed in a tiny voice. “I really hope he’s gone for good… but upper-level demons like him, they come back. And we have to be ready.”

“Can he wait at least two decades or so?”

“I hope so, sweetie. I really do. But I also hope that by then you won't think we don’t love you. Haven’t I done enough to show you I care about your weirdo and cute self?” Phoebe asked, earnest and frustrated. "It’s not normal that your magic practically disappears when Prue is mentioned.”

“I believe you care.” She replied with emphasis on the “you”, and Phoebe frowned, but nodded in understanding. From what she could see, her sisters were doing better as they were now talking and Paige wasn't threatening to leave every few days, but Piper was so cautious around Paige it made even her, feel awkward.

\------

In all the commotion, and because the walls were thin indeed in the Halliwell house, Piper had also woken up. Leo slept like a rock, she wondered if it was some whitelighter thing, but nothing woke him up. She heard Phoebe running towards Paige’s room, the sisterly instinct strong in both of them, but even though she stood up, she remained awkwardly rooted to the spot near her bed. As time passed and no one came running to her bedroom, screaming at her to explode or freeze something, she sighed. She should be happy their week was running as normal as possible, but her hands, the source of all the destruction she could bring when she put her mind to it, twitched in discomfort. She couldn’t be just that to Paige, the active weapon in the Power of Three. She wanted to be, if not a sister, at least a friend. Putting on a robe, she took a deep breath and walked towards Prue’s, now Paige’s room. The place in the house she avoided more than any other room in the house, if she was being honest.

When she got there, she hung back behind the door, listening to Phoebe’s most soothing voice and they couldn’t see her, in the position they were in. Paige was resting her head against Phoebe’s shoulder, eyes closed, and Phoebe had angled her body to really comfort her younger sister.

“… Paige, I want you to stop trying to fill someone else’s shoes. Beyond the magic, because I don’t care if you can orb me to Tokyo, which I will ask of you at some point, personal gain be damned, you are already great.” Phoebe tells the newly redhead girl, who merely nods to the words she’s told.

“I just feel like she’s not even human. There are all these pictures in the house that prove to me that she is, but the way Piper… I mean, you weren’t in the graveyard when she became a fury. You can only be that angry at someone who meant the world to you. I am just the strange girl who moved into her sister’s room!” She looked around and saw all the things in the room that screamed some part of her personality and shook her head furiously. “I gave this room a complete makeover and I still feel like it’s not mine. Do you have any idea how that feels?”

“No, I don’t.” Phoebe said solemnly and Paige smiled gratefully at the acknowledgement of her feelings. “But that we don’t want you here… that’s all in your head, I swear. It sucks that you had to move here of all places, but Paige, this was a shrine. Prue wouldn’t have liked it, I think.

“You don’t really talk about her, why?” Paige asked, not wanting to discuss her feelings about Piper.

“I don’t know, that’s how I cope with it. I miss her, how couldn’t I? But the way I see it, the sooner I move on, the sooner I’ll be able to talk to Prue again, like we do sometimes with Mom. I don’t think Piper’s there yet.” Phoebe said with a sigh and Piper could see Paige nodding her head to that statement. “Paige, if it’s any consolation, if Prue had the chance to meet you, she would have kicked me out of the house and adopted you as the better baby sister. I swear to God, when I was fifteen I thought my name was “you fuck up”. She had this way of making me feel like shit…” Phoebe chuckled, but the sound was sad this time. "I owe so much of who I am to her. I swear, she was my harshest critic but nobody smiled bigger than Prue in that auditorium when I scraped by my senior year and made it to graduation day."

“Is that like a big sister thing? Because that’s how Piper makes me feel.” Paige finally blurted and immediately regretted it. “I-- I am sorry. I know she's trying too. I just don't think she likes me.”

Something told Piper, loud as hell, that nothing Phoebe could say would help their younger sister feel better and this was her moment to step in. Something told her that Paige would only believe that it wasn’t like that if it came from her. Before she could think, she was speaking. “You really resemble her, Paige” Piper says the first thing that comes to mind, and both her sisters react to her voice. Phoebe snaps her head, regarding her with curiosity and worry. Paige couldn’t even look at her, making a face, probably wondering how much she’s heard. “Out of the three of us, you look the most like her and I think, the world is stupidly cruel when you want to forget, huh?”

Phoebe is now angry, and she can tell by the way she’s pleading for her to stop talking and just walk away. Paige is silent, and she looks so little in that huge bed, even with Phoebe by her side. Her little sister took to being the middle one surprisingly easy, considering how little age difference there was between them and how she was never, ever, the mediator. Paige and Phoebe got along, that she could tell. And the closer they got, the more they left her out.

“Piper, I’m sorry? I don’t know what you heard but…” Piper silenced Paige’s nervous voice with a hand gesture, ignored Phoebe’s glare and kept talking, before she lost her confidence. “I believe that was the reason I was so mean to you when we first met. You had the same talent, the same power, as I said, you two look the most Halliwell of the bunch… and you weren’t her.” Paige felt like she was kicked straight into the stomach and Phoebe actually motioned with her hands to shut it. “No, no, that’s not a problem. You don’t need to be like Prue, magically or sisterly because… because she’s gone.” And oh, wow. Two years and the words still knock the wind out of her. “You are two different sisters to me. Paige, you are your own person and that woman is beyond kind, loyal, stubborn and I know you will risk your life for a stranger, unfortunately for me, just like Phoebe over here” she seeks Phoebe for support and this time, her sister nods, with an encouraging smile. “If anything, I should be the one wondering how on Earth I got so lucky to have you in the family. You are valuable to all of us… to me. I just suck, I’m sorry.”

As soon as she stopped talking, she felt very self-conscious. She wasn’t planning on telling Paige all of this, she was just going to insert herself in the situation and her first instinct was to demand answers on how she made her feel like shit, because she didn’t think she did. Her soul knew better, though and her feelings had now poured out of her like a broken dam. 

“Say something, will you?” Piper asked, crossing her arms. Paige was dumbstruck. Her relationship with her eldest sister had always been… complicated and the difference with the one she had with Phoebe was rooted in the fact that she knew she was wanted. From the start, Paige believed that her older sister had wanted a little sibling her whole life because by God, she could be smothering. Phoebe was just so charming - no pun intended. She was easy to like, easy to talk to. Piper’s presence in her life was hard-earned, fought and sometimes, still very brittle. Paige walked on eggshells around her, cracking jokes that masked her true feelings or just pretending to be fine, every single time Piper asked.

“Do you mean it? Am I… do you think I’m a valuable person?”

“I suck more than I thought if I made you doubt that.” Piper replied, visibly uncomfortable.

“… You don’t suck.” Paige manages to tell her, after several very, very long seconds. 

“Look at both of you!” Phoebe was beaming, going as far as to clutch a hand on her chest.

“Don’t be dramatic, Phoebe.” Piper tells her and looks over to Paige, with a small, reassuring smile. At making eye contact, Paige couldn’t help it: a heavy sob escaped her and she covered her face with her hands. While it startled both of her sisters, Phoebe went straight to comfort her. Sometimes, Piper was a tiny bit jealous of how after a lifetime of trying to get Phoebe to understand what she needed, she seemed to have Paige all figured out. Sitting gingerly on the bed, she locked eyes with Phoebe and mouthed “can I hug her?” Phoebe just shrugged and after a moment of hesitation, Paige kept trying to stop the tears, so that helped her make up her mind. She goes in and hugs her sister, truly hugs Paige for the first time in their lives. She tries not to panic when she is not being hugged back but then Paige just slumps against her, grabbing unto her like she is been waiting to do it and Piper’s heart breaks in half with love. She grips her little sister tight.

“Oh man, I’m really sorry about that.” Paige whispers, and sniffles.

Somewhere in this hug, Phoebe had left the room.

“So…” Piper began, shooing away Paige’s hand from her cheeks and replacing it with her own thumbs. She was amazed at how naturally wiping this girl’s tears felt. “I should have been better with you, Paige, I know, but I… I didn’t know how. Sometimes you scare me. Did Phoebe ever tell you that?”

“What do you mean? I know I’m a little edgy here and there but –“

“No, you dummy. Of all the problems you and I could have… you are wrong on what you are worried about. I knew I’d like you from the start. And hell, Prue’s death was so fresh… I didn’t want someone to guide or play big sister to. It just seemed like inviting pain in. And the Source wanted our asses, and your life was already in danger and you could barely orb from here to your bathroom… I was a cruel teacher because I wanted you to live. And you know what? You kept things moving, you helped more than you know. Maybe I wouldn't be pregnant now.

Paige blinked twice at her comment. "What do I have to do with your sex life?”

“I hated Leo. I blamed him for her death, more than most people. I blamed everyone, though.”

“Why couldn’t you let Phoebe train me if it was so hard for you?” Paige asked her, a confused frown etched on her face.

“Because Phoebe is my little sister too. My whole life I have tried to keep her out of the fight. And the non-magical hand-on-hand style Phoebe spurs on those suckers ended up helping in the magical area, not the other way around. You would emulate Pheebs and not focus on how you'd win a fight. And you were kind of obsessed with her at the start, remember?" Piper chuckled. "It's easy to get dazzled by her on paper. I wanted you to be perfect, I had to oversee it myself.”

“Ego, much?”

“Yeah, well. I’m a ball of neurosis and a control-freak." Piper could tell that Paige was trying hard not to agree. "If you really want to train with Phoebe that bad, how about you two spar in the basement now that you know your stuff? I mean, I am going to start waddling one of these days, give the pregnant lady some entertainment” She adds with a sly, wide smile that Paige returns. Piper always thought Paige looked particularly beautiful and _young, god, how young she still was,_ when she smiled.

“Yeah, even with my orbing she will kick my ass.” Paige admits with a sigh that’s not unhappy. Piper knows that Paige loves practical magic; she gets as excited as children do for candy for surprise training sessions. “But I see your point.”

Piper rests her head against the pillows of Paige’s bed, another natural thing she didn’t know she could do.

“Could you tell me more about your fear?”

“I just didn’t know I had this crippling fear of not being a part of something because I’ve been alone my whole life. Guarded person, only child, friend to everyone but never lets anyone in… that’s me.” Paige purses her lips in thoughts. “How can you fear something that’s your reality?”

“Because it's not your reality anymore, and you liked it." Piper replies, easily. "And I'm not being sage or anything, that's more the way my husband would deal with your question. I just remember that you told me that you didn't want to go back to being an only child last year. You have me, Paige. You already know Phoebe’s on your corner but, I don’t know if you knew that Leo adores you? Yep. He fought all the time with me to be nicer, to be kinder, to include you…” Piper confesses, looking down at the bed. “And you’ll have a baby niece to spoil rotten very soon!”

“Yeah, I’ll be an auntie.” Paige grins, with pride. “Never thought I would say those words.”

She mulled over her next words, carefully. “Your perspective as an outsider, and don’t take this the wrong way because you are very much a Halliwell if not in name, it changed everything. You were brand new and you never let us make you small. You broke all those ruts, you figured Cole out before any of us… We needed you. I just wish, with all my heart that Prue could have been here to see you being a badass witch and an amazing sister.” Piper knew she was going to cry any minute now; her voice shook and she felt a lump growing in her throat. “I know she was probably very mad at me. Not only was I a stupid bitch to you, but I put so much pressure on Phoebe as well. She would have handled things differently if I was gone and maybe our sister wouldn't have been through… well, Hell.”

“How? How could she have avoided that?”

“I don’t know. She was the boss, not me” Piper grinned at her. "Sorry to inform you that I am making everything up as we go."

“I want to know more about Prue. Not the witch, but the sister… how about we miss her, together?” Paige tells her, and Piper has to swallow her tears at her baby sister taking the steps she cannot take so boldly.

“Sounds like a plan.” She replies and runs her fingers through the red curls of her sister’s head. After a while of silence, that’s not quite uncomfortable but new, Piper glances around the room and grins. “Another thing in common, huh?”

“What?”

“You paint, she took pictures. The artistic thing escaped Phoebe and I.”

Paige hums in response. “I would say your cooking is an art.”

“Flattery will get you nowhere with me.” Piper replied, narrowing her eyes, but she was in a much better mood right now. “And the way Phoebe dates is an art as well.”

“Piper!” Paige swats her arm, fake scandalized, but they dissolve in giggles at the expense of their sister.

“Hey, Prue was a photographer in that magazine, right? 401?”

“You were quite the little stalker, Missy Paige.” Piper mumbled and wondered if she had been the one all alone, would she have looked for her sisters? Paige lived across town and yet she knew about Prue’s job, hung out at P3 and done her research to the point that when she showed up at their steps, it was obvious she already knew where they lived and was waiting for an excuse to drop by.

“I couldn’t be totally sure, but I felt this connection to all of you. You were the only one I saw in person, before.”

“Say what?” Piper was stunned.

“Yeah, my obsession started with P3. I read about a party you hosted and the newspaper put your name and your age. So I started researching you, don't get freaked out. Just regular stuff. I found out the date of Mom's passing and it made mathematical perfect sense. That's when I went to the club, for a friend's 21st. I kinda insisted on her birthday being there." Paige confessed. "You almost served me a drink, I was that desperate to talk to you, but I thought better of it. Risking my newfound sobriety for a random lady? I'm better at knowing my limits now but back then... No, thank you.”

“I hate Grams for making us live like this. I was so mad on behalf of you, Paige."

“Yeah, well, Mom has been nothing but nice to me. I can tell that she loves me and…

“Oh God! Have you seen her again?” Piper asked. "Is it a secret?" 

“Sort of. The Elders didn’t tell me I couldn’t say anything, I just wanted to keep it to myself for a while, but yes, I’ve been talking to mom lately. And she’s the mom I always wanted her to be. The Elders have been more lenient to my case, supposedly for the Power of Three’s bond, but I think Grams had something to do about it. I understand what had to be done, I do.”

“You are the most mature 26-year-old I’ve met.”

“I had amazing parents. I need to talk about them more often…” she mumbles in a sleepy voice. "And call my Aunt!"

"You have living relatives?" Piper felt awful for not knowing and also a bit jealous that they knew her sister better than she did.

"It's just my Aunt and my little cousin. She is a single mom, I lived with her on and off while I was at Berkeley. Her daughter is like 8 years old or something, maybe she could come here and play with the niece" Paige shrugged but she knew how a request from her sounded like. "Although the age gap is big, so I understand -"

"Hey, this is witchcraft not vampirism." Piper shook her head. "I am your big sister, not your boss."

"Nah, you are kinda my boss too." She stuck out her tongue.

"No, Paige! I am not." Piper denied vehemently. "You can still see your family and talk to them. Just let me know, so all three of us are at home and they are safer from any attack or whatever weirdness might ensue."

"Alright" Paige mumbled with another yawn.

She takes that as her cue to leave and closes the door.

\------

Paige is falling asleep with a smile on her face, finally moving somewhere good with Piper, when she’s shook from the state of sleep and consciousness she was in by her older sister bursting through the door. They never listened when she told them to knock.

“Okay, so I have to tell you something.”

“What?” Paige is utterly and adorably confused.

“Phoebe will kill me if I don’t” she mutters and she is moving her hands frantically, like she’s actually going to lurch towards the bed.

“What, Piper?”

“Love you.” She blurts. “I mean, I love you.” It still sounds weird. "I would hate to leave this little bonding session, ugh, Phoebe is already calling it that, I'm sorry, can you believe her? Anyway, not leaving without letting you know that. I love you, okay?” Piper takes a deep breath after she says all this and she's a little amazed herself at how fast she can talk without her words mumbling, but then again, Piper talks fast when she’s nervous.

Paige gives her a new smile, it's really bright. Piper is taken aback by how much she already loved the girl and she just didn't want to see it.

“Okay, Piper.” She finally nods and Paige is taking deep breaths as well. “I love you too!”

Piper nods awkwardly, does a weird circling motion with her hands and waves goodbye. And turning on her back, she is reassured of two things: that she's really got a handle on her powers by all that hand choreography she did there and nothing caught fire, and that she is not bothered that she left without closing the door. She smiles at the fact that Paige doesn't bother to get up and do it herself. 

Tonight, they all sleep safe. 


End file.
